Randall Murphree

AFA Journal editor

June 2005 – If a man is honest when he relates his own life stories, he’s still prideful enough to conceal or gloss over some of the unpleasant pieces of his past. But Bill Swindell doesn’t appear to hide much of anything in his book Fathers, Come Home (Boys Town Press, 2005). In fact, he uses his failures as well as his successes to illustrate some deep truths about being a father. 

He’s clear about his humble beginnings as a sharecropper’s son in southern Mississippi. Honest about the hardships that came with being among six children of a single mom. Open even about how his later success almost robbed his own children of their father. His openness is what makes this 145-page volume pack such a wallop. 

For example, one of Swindell’s stories recalls how he returned home from work one day to their San Diego suburb. He looked out over the Pacific Ocean, still absorbed in the worries and pressures of his day at the office. Without his noticing, four-year-old Sara climbed into his lap, longing for his attention. 

When it became evident to the child that Daddy’s mind was somewhere else, she squeezed his cheeks in her little hands, turned his face toward hers, looked directly into his eyes and said, "Earth calling Daddy, earth calling Daddy!" 

"At first, it sounded precocious and cute," writes Swindell. "Then the words sank in. They began to echo again and again through my mind. ... What did she mean? What did she see in my eyes? Nothing! While she was silently screaming for a few moments of my time, I was oblivious to her very existence." 

For Swindell, it was a turning point, one of many. He packs this book full of such anecdotes, often making the reader laugh and other times tugging at the heartstrings. It is appealing on other levels too — it is just plain easy and fun to read, not only for dads, but also for the whole family. And perhaps most important, its strong moral component challenges all of us to reexamine our life priorities. 

Learning to father 
Swindell and his wife Linda have two married daughters and two granddaughters. Swindell says those girls have taught him more about being a father than just about anything else could have done. Kari and Sara, his daughters, each contributed afterwords to the book. 

Again and again, Swindell makes other men think he’s been reading their minds because they’ve had the same experiences he relates. And with each story, he leads the reader to consider his own relationships with his wife and children. 

"I want this little book not to discourage fathers, but to encourage and challenge them," said Swindell. "As the old saying goes, ‘It’s never too late to do the right thing.’" 

Swindell served two tours of duty in Vietnam. After the military, he has spent his adult life as an executive in various non-profit organizations including a number of years with the Red Cross and four years at AFA. He is now national director of development for Father Flanagan’s Girls and Boys Town (GBT). 

Fathers, Come Home is a collection of poignant vignettes that will strike a common chord with all fathers who have ever let career, success or ambition take them too far away from their families. In addition to opening his own soul, Swindell draws on the experiences of others to expose some of the pitfalls of parenting and offer practical pointers to help fathers return to home and family.